Adam's 17!

I can't believe I have a 17 year old! It's not like I was a teenage mom or anything. I didn't get married until I was 23, we waited a year before trying, then it was almost another year waiting for him to arrive. Am I really that old? I'd rather think that instead of getting older, I'm getting better or more experienced. Anyway, enough about me.

What an amazing 17 year old Adam is! He's smarter than most adults (taller than them too at 6'1"). He's true to himself, although I don't know if he's found his true self yet. He doesn't change to suit the people he's around. He doesn't always know why he likes or does what he does, but he'll stay true to that instead of always trying to fit in. He's the one his friends go to for advice, even ones that are 5 to 7 years older. He manages to figure out the best course of action for others. It's not always so easy to do that for himself, but he has a gift of insight when it comes to helping others through life. Even though he acts like he's the lone rebel, I know by the advice he gives people that his heart is right and his head's on straight on the things that really matter.

He's determined to get into college and have a career rather than just jump from minimum wage job to another. He wants to take the business route. Not sure what field yet. He's had business classes, leadership classes, read dozens of business-related books on everything from motivation to running a company. He's had accounting, personal finance and even Teen Pact government classes where he spent a week learning the whole process of legislation at our state house.

I'm proud of who he's becoming. He takes his job seriously and once he finally sets a goal, he goes after it until he gets what he wants. He's learned not to take anything for granted anymore, and at least with me, he's more appreciative than he used to be, even just 6 months ago.

I'm so thankful I've homeschooled him all the way through 11th grade so far. It's helped us develop such a close relationship. He's willing to open up and talk to me because I've learned an important secret: Don't JUDGE what your kids say, don't CRITICIZE their ideas. Just hear them out, ask questions that make them give plans more thought, and let them know that whatever they decide, you'll still love them - but there will be consequences if they choose poorly. Kids don't often realize the repercussions of their actions before-hand. It's our job to offer a warning, experience and examples, then you have to let go and let natural consequences or rewards happen. Take that away to be controlling, or in the name of protecting them, and they won't learn anything. Life and experience is a far better teacher than scolding and nagging. They don't listen that way because they think they know everything already, right? The best you can do is offer your perspective and let go.

In just over one year, he'll be out on his own, an adult in this world. Do I think he'll make mistakes? Of course. Do I think he'll do things I'd never allow under my roof, yes, but I don't see him taking the path of smoking, drinking, messing around from girl to girl, taking drugs, or anything else along those lines. I'm not blind to his weaknesses. We've just talked about these things and I know HIS perspective on them. He's smart enough to sit back and watch others make mistakes like these, and then learn NOT to follow what they did. It's a wise way to live.

I'm very blessed to have such a great young man for my first-born son.