Living Simply Challenge Day 26: Giving Back

     Today's challenge is an easy one. I'll give you a list of ways to give back to others, or "pay it forward", then you pick the ones that are do-able. Giving back tends to become essential to a lot of minimalists and those who choose a more simple life. It's a way of being thankful, helping others, appreciating not only what you have, but the differences between people and groups. It's one thing that could change the world, by people just taking the focus off themselves and focusing on others. Turn selfishness into selflessness. People will tell you, they decided to give back and were surprised that it ended up feeling like THEY got the most reward, in the feeling of helping others. Let's explore a list of way to help make the world a better place.

• Volunteer - at a school, a church, a charity, worthwhile organization, soup kitchen, homeless shelter, women's and children's shelter, Boys & Girls Clubs, YMCA or other teen/youth center, pregnancy crisis center, marathon or walkathon for a good cause, library story time, etc.
• Donate Blood through the Red Cross - just go to their website to find a location near you. It takes about half an hour if you make an appointment, about an hour or so if you just walk in, and you can donate every 8 weeks. They even send you a card with your blood type, and will email you with where your blood went. For example, once mine went to a teenage crash victim to help save her life. Some of it's used for scientific research to try curing diseases.
• Animal Shelter - they love volunteers to help clean cages and feed animals, but did you know that they also need people to come and pet the cats and dogs? It's a great program for younger kids to learn about giving back. Check your local area to see how their program works.
• Operation Gratitude - it's an organization to support military troops away from their families. You can check them out online. They send packages to them (with guidelines found on the website), or you could write to a soldier thanking them for their service.
• Habitat for Humanity - builds houses for those who otherwise couldn't afford a decent, affordable place to live. The waiting list is huge and the people who move in are very grateful families, not people randomly given a handout. The families are part of a program that helps them get on their feet. If you can't build or paint, you could donate furniture and household items as well.
• Raise money - you could do this in a charity walk, an auction, a silent auction benefit, a benefit dinner, make something and sell it giving the proceeds to a good cause.
• Become an organ donor - one organ donor can save 8 lives! And can improve the lives of over 50 people with tissue and other donations! All you do is check a box when getting your next driver's license and it's done. Easy as that.
• Donate your skills - if you're a doctor, dentist, lawyer, or other professional, you could give your time and skills for free at planned events/intervals to help the underprivileged. You could offer free medical shots/dental checkups in a free clinic in a poor neighborhood. You could offer services in an orphanage. You could help battered spouses get free with legal skills. 
• Shop wisely - there are companies like TOMS (the shoe company, which now has expanded to other products) , that gives back. Whenever they sell a pair of shoes, they give a pair to an impoverished child. Check out their donations online, it's impressive. They gave 10,000 pairs to kids in one country, 140,000 pairs in another, and they give all around the world. In addition to TOMS, there's other companies that follow Fair Trade laws, donate huge percentages of their proceeds to those without, etc. Do some research on the company the next time you need a product. 
• Support small, local, family businesses - by shopping with them first when you do need something. I love finding treasures at the local book store, thrift store, etc. It keeps the dollars in your own community while helping the little guy who has trouble staying afloat alongside the major chain retailers.
• Do a "drive" - canned food drive, clothing drive, school supplies drive, book drive, blankets drive for the homeless, water drive for the homeless, etc.

     Those are some bigger things but what about the everyday, unscheduled things you can do to help others? What can one person do to make a difference in the life of another person as they struggle through their day? Some of these things listed will seem like just good old-fashioned manners or common sense, but lately, that's not something found in our culture anymore. Many of these little things make a huge impact on people because it's so rare to see sometimes. Here's a quick list of easy things you can do anytime, no scheduling required:

• Hold the door open for the person behind you when entering/exiting a building, store, restaurant, etc. It's amazing how many people leave and let the door slam into the person behind them. Hold the door for them.
• Leave a positive review on Yelp or whatever website most helps a small, local business that you love. Help them stay in business with just a few moments of your time. I did that for a local Greek restaurant, then the next time, I mentioned to the owner than I thought the food and service was so good I felt like I had to go give them a good review. She unexpectedly gave me a discount on my order. I never did it to get something back, and only mentioned it to compliment her family, but got rewarded in the process of doing good.
• Inspire and Encourage others - instead of being "that guy" on social media with negative comments on everything, find opportunities to post a quick word of encouragement or inspiration. I've seen negative people comment harsh things when someone donates thousands to impoverished kids, volunteers to help people, etc. Be the one that lets the person doing a good deed know it's noticed, and worth it to keep trying.
• Free Rice - I just recently realized this website still exists! I used to use it years ago. You go to their site: Free Rice (just click on this link), you answer vocabulary questions and for every answer you get right, they donate 10 grains of rice. It promotes education and attempts to help world hunger. Play that instead of solitaire or some other desktop/mobile game when you're bored or waiting for an appointment.
• Pay - for the person behind you in a drive thru, or at a coffee place. It'll make their day and you'll leave with a smile.
• Offer your seat - when there's none left. It can be at the Division of Motor Vehicles, on a city bus or subway, in a doctor's office, etc.
• Clean up litter - by yourself or with a group, at a local park or shared space (like the grassy area or courtyard where you live)
• Write a quick note to brighten someone's day
• Bake or cook and share with someone you know is going through a rough time, or just a neighbor

     Whatever you do, just do something. Find a need and fill it. Not only can it help others, but you'll feel better for it as well.
   

Living Simply challenge Day 25: MythBusting

     Whenever I hear people talking about minimalism, they usually start saying how they love all their stuff. Really? ALL of it? The average home contains over 300,000 items. I would bet I could sneak in and remove 100 things and no one would notice. They think it's about living like a monk in a TV monastary - living in an 8 x 8 cement cell, cement floors, nothing but one bed, and one lamp on a small table. Today isn't a challenge to do as much as it's a challenge to gain REAL information about minimalism and living simply. I challenge you to read the following myths and truths and expand your mind. If you do no other daily challenges from July or August - do this one and educate yourself...then decide if you could go back and knock out a few of these daily challenges.

Myth 1:
Minimalism means living with nothing/only what fits in one backpack/empty rooms and closets.

Truth1:
No, not at all. It means removing the excess clutter from your house, the things you bought on impulse, things you got as gifts but know you'll never ever wear or use, the stuff that is out-dated and no longer has value or brings joy to you. Once you get rid of the things that mean nothing, what's left is the meaningful things that make your house or apartment a home. Love collecting something and it's meaningful? Keep it. Do you pick up mementos from your travels only to find them sitting where you put them after your trip 3 years ago, gathering dust? Donate, sell, or toss them.

Myth 2:
What a boring life you'd have if you get rid of your technology/tv/car/stuff.

Truth 2:
That's not true at all. Most minimalists do have a laptop, although some only use it where they can get free wi-fi instead of paying a monthly internet bill. Some do get rid of cable or even their tv, but others don't because it's something they use to find joy. You should also note that those who keep it don't tend to sit and watch tv for hours on end 6 or 7 hours a week. They use it to deliberately watch movies, shows, and documentaries they choose (or sports they love), often with other people and they discuss it afterwards over dessert and coffee/cocktails.

Myth 3:
Minimalists only have stuff they got free or cheap so it's all crappy stuff.

Truth 3:
Actually, most minimalists do try to find ways to save money like buying clothing from a thrift store or on places like ebay, which also helps the environment because they're "recycling" something that already exists rather than feeding into the overproducing of stuff no one needs. There are many people in the fashion industry that will tell you they purposely have to destroy perfectly good clothing to continue the 30 day "seasonal styles" so consumers will buy non-stop. Millions, if not billions of dollars of clothes get shredded instead of donating it to worthwhile charities. It's so wasteful! Still, many minimalists WILL purchase more expensive items because of their quality. They'd rather buy a few pairs of good jeans or one winter jacket that lasts for years rather than have to keep repurchasing the same type of items every few months when they wear out.

Myth 4:
Aren't they all vegans and anti-meat industry protesters?

Truth 4:
No. There are vegans, vegetarians, carnivores, pescatarians, and more in any group, whether the members are minimalists or not. It's a personal thing. Some choose a vegan/vegetarian lifestyle for their own ethical reasons. Others enjoy a typical diet with meat and poultry because they want to get the benefits found in them (for example, there is no non-meat natural way to get Vitamin B12 unless you take a lab created supplement).

Myth 5:
Minimalists keep the items they own under a certain number.

Truth 5:
No, most of them don't. Although there are a few, like Colin Wright, who travels the world with one backpack and works with his laptop from wherever he is - that's not the norm. There's all types of books and articles on how to limit things like a closet full of unused clothing.  Some people decide for themselves to do a 30, 33, or 35 piece "capsule wardrobe" where many outfits are made by mixing and matching similar pieces that go together. I currently keep my closet to 35 items or less, but as things wear out or don't fit, I intentionally replace them with pieces that WILL work with the rest so the goal is a capsule type wardrobe, but from where I started, that wasn't possible. I didn't have non-stained shirts w/o holes in them at one point - so yes, purchasing clothing is still a thing for me, but nothing gets purchased without thought, finding it at a below average price (not just on sale, I buy a $35 blouse if I can get it for around $7 for example), and it must match the basic color/style of what else I already own or I don't buy it.

Myth 6:
Minimalists look down on everyone else as if they're better than the rest of us.

Truth 6:
Most minimalists actually are striving for a more simple life. There's no joy, contentment, nor incentive to put others down who don't embrace the concept of minimalism. Everyone's so different that it looks different for everyone. If you really explore this topic, you'll see many minimalists share secrets, ebooks, information, blogs, articles, and more with people - for FREE. They want to bring a message about how to live a happier, more meaningful, intentional live pursuing your passions - whatever they may be. It has nothing to do with making everyone look, dress, and live exactly as they do. They broke away from what everyone else was doing to get where they are - why would they want to create that all over again?

Myth 7:
It only works for single, young, white guys in their 20s.

Truth 7:
Not true at all! There are minimalist out there sharing their stories. They come from all walks of life. There's a Dad with many children, retirement age couples, single people, the breadwinners in their 40s hoping to retire someday, farming families, city dwellers, and those making it work in the suburbs. The differences may be how they don't waste money on buying every new movie, they either rent or borrow it. Maybe they don't buy their kids every single toy on the market, but instead, focus on a few better quality ones that the kids will enjoy rather than a roomful of stuff the kids didn't really want, so they're bored with just 1000 toys all over their floor and in their toy boxes.  Maybe the young couple decides to buy technology a few years old rather than upgrading at full price on the day it comes out. Maybe bartering in more rural areas replaces having to buy all things new. Some write about trading sewing skills in making clothes for things like eggs and produce from another's garden.

As far as race, ethnicity, etc. that has absolutely NOTHING to do with it. We're all people who want a life filled with more joy than stress, who have things we'd like to pursue and things we'd like to avoid. Minimalism and Living Simply is for anyone who wants it. And if someone decides it's not for them, so what? Let them live their life the way that makes them happy.

     Hopefully now you have a better understanding of true minimalism, and living a more simple life - what it is and what it isn't. Now with more knowledge on the subject, you can decide for yourself.

Living Simply challenge Day 24: The Matrix

          Have you seen the movie The Matrix with Keanu Reeves? If not I'll try to sum up the plot for you. A guy who's going through life feeling like there's got to be more out there, like something is wrong with this world but he can't seem to put his finger on it. Then he finds out that the world he thinks is real is just a dream. His real body is being kept alive in a dreaming state. Everything he thought was his real life was just a program designed to keep him asleep. Without revealing everything else, this description is enough to start today's challenge - waking up to see the matrix for what it is.

     What matrix are you caught in? The matrix of consumerism, the race to be (and to only take care of) "number one". The accumulation of things makes others envious of you and that's supposed to be the goal - to be "somebody" - to have it all before you die. Did you know those ideas are not your own? They're the programming we in America have been given to manipulate us into buying stuff we don't need, with money we don't have, to impress people we don't like. Here's 3 examples of how consumers are being manipulated:

1.  The obvious is the Keeping Up with the Jones' scenario. You like your house until you visit someone with a better one. You like your car until your neighbor gets a better one. You buy labels that advertising portrays as the key to getting ahead. If you wear a designer's label, whether on clothing, on a purse, etc. then you can pretend you're part of an elite society that's somehow better than everyone else just because you own and display someone else's name. American's carry over $764 billion dollars of credit card debt. That's 764 BILLION dollars worth of stuff (minus a few for education, buying necessities like groceries, and travel expenses for emergencies). That's insane! Don't people remember just a few years ago when many people lost their homes, trashed their credit, and had to declare bankruptcy because they were too far in consumer debt? Stop buying stuff you don't need. It's killing you, financially.

2.  The less obvious is the clothing industry. It used to be that clothes came in two seasons, warm weather and cold weather. You bought boots, coats, pants, snowsuits for the kids, all at the same time of year. Then you bought bathing suits, shorts, t-shirts, and tank tops the other time of year. The clothing industry then began rotating seasons in a 4 season cycle. Still not too bad I guess, if you live in a place where all 4 seasons really are different. But now, in the last few years, the clothing industry has changed. It now creates, markets, and sells things in 30 DAY CYCLES! As soon as you purchase something you're made to feel it's almost immediately out of date so you'll buy more. And the more expensive the label, the shorter the life of that season. Do you have a closet full of stuff you never wear? Almost all American households do. If you don't wear it, or take it off as soon as you put it on because you never really did like it, then WHY are you holding onto it? Give it away, donate it, toss it, but stop hanging onto it. Anything you haven't worn or used in a year should belong to someone else.

3.  The most insidious is the food industry. Did you know they spend millions of dollars every year to manipulate you into buying their foods. Here's just a few tactics used:

- Fake ads: milk makes cereal soggy so in photos, it's glue, steaming hot food is really a sponge or cotton ball microwaved and hidden carefully to look like steam coming off the food, shiny fruit in ads are actually sprayed with hair spray, antacids are used to simulate more soda pop bubbles, etc.

- Psychologists do test studies where they, for example, observe how much potato chips people eat before they stop. Then they design a single serving bag to be a few ounces shy of that so you'll be tempted to open a second bag, since the first one didn't satisfy you.

- They inject food with all kinds of chemicals to simulate a better taste because you'd never eat it with all the fillers and junk they use (google things like "pink slime" and "sawdust" in hamburgers). They make foods have a different mouth feel than they should, they use toxic sweeteners to trigger the addiction areas of your brain so you'll eat more and buy more. Check out online information about how diet sodas make people fatter and sicker.

- In the grocery store, healthy cereals are placed on the very top and very bottom shelves. The shelves at eye level cost much more for a manufacturer to "rent". They put the most expensive, most modified, unhealthiest foods at eye level. In the cereal aisle, there's a multi-billion dollar industry that designs packaging, commercials, and displays at the eye level of children riding in shopping carts so they'll beg and shout in the store for their particular unhealthy cereal.

- Grocery stores alter everything from lighting to scents they design in certain areas of the store. It's no surprise they make sure there's rotisserie chicken and bakery smells as you walk by those areas in the store. Some is real, I'll give you that, but there are MANY companies that purposely spray scents in overhead vents in areas to make you desire and buy their products. Some very unethical grocery stores were caught on the news a few years back putting altered lighting above meat counters to make the meats appear different than their actual color to look more appealing to the eye. And never buy a package of flavored chicken or beef in the meat department! They take old, discolored meat, like beef that was bright red but is now turning more brown due to original air exposure, and they inject it with red dye and add flavorings to cover it up like say, "Chipotle Hamburger Patties". Those packages of pre-seasoned/pre-flavored chicken, like lemon pepper, is also older meat that's been altered to look and taste fresher, then repackaged.

     Don't fall for the matrix of marketing. Open your eyes to what's really going on. Do your research online to find out who's trying to manipulate you into parting with your hard-earned money. Ethics are no longer a thing in the business world (with the exception of a few organic or smaller family companies). It's all about the money. Do your homework and you'll find almost every product in the grocery store is manufactured by one of only a handful of companies:
   

     Be smart. Shop wisely. Be aware of your shopping. What's driving your purchase? Is it marketing gimmicks or are you only purchasing what you need, when you need it, knowing it's not just a "want", it's a "need", and is it something that will bring you joy? 

Living simply challenge Day 23: Dream

     What do you want to be when you grow up? We ask this question to little preschoolers, grammar school kids, teenagers, and even college students - but then what happens? All of a sudden no one asks you anymore what you want to be/become. It leaves most adults feeling lost, like they somehow missed an unseen opportunity, because if no one's asking anymore, then I guess we should've figured it out by now, right? Wrong!

     Life has a way of intruding on our dreams. Before you know it, you're in high school working a job for a little extra cash, or to save for a car, but you get used to earning that amount, (and spending that amount) - so you go off to a full time job, or you try to work while in college. Both paths leave you exhausted but you try your best to spend time with family and friends, have a few adventures and nights out with "the guys" or a "ladies night out" now and then. Before you know it, you're somehow in your late 20s, now you have the responsibility of living expenses, you pay for your own vehicle, maintenance, and insurance. Then you're in your 30s with a couple of kids, more expenses, a larger house or apartment, and there's no time to stop working and dream.

     Your 40s fly by but you start thinking you can almost see a few relaxing days of retirement on the horizon - you hope. In your 50s you realize you didn't get enough saved to retire on so you've postponed your dreams of retiring and traveling. By the time your in your 60s your (or your spouse's) health is your main concern and you let go of your dreams. Depressing - BUT WAIT!!!

     What if you could live intentionally starting today to enjoy a more simple life - sooner?! It actually IS possible. Lots of other people have figured out how to chase and achieve their dreams. It takes intentional baby steps in the same direction to reach your destination. The journey of a thousand miles begins with one step. It doesn't matter how old or young you are. You can choose today to start dreaming again and PLAN your future. How? Here's a few ideas to get you thinking:

1.  Declutter everything that you don't need, that doesn't add value to your life nor does it bring you joy. Some stuff needs to be tossed, other stuff donated, but I would SELL whatever you have that's worth anything. People all over the world have made hundreds and even thousands by selling off outdated technology, collector's items, historic memorabilia, jewelry, clothing, excess furniture, spare vehicles, almost anything you can think of. There's great apps out there to help you like Letgo.com (and you can google lots of others, but be sure it's a reputable company with reviews). There's still eBay out there. Yard sales, Craig's List, Post it on Facebook. Lots of ways to sell your old stuff.

2.  Once you've earned some money, pay down some debt. Make this your #1 goal for a little while so that once debt is gone, you're free to dream about anything you want to do, anywhere you want to go.

3.  Consider your living space. Do you have a home that's more than you need? I know so many people that have a "spare" bedroom, often 2 or 3 once the kids grow up and move out. If you took your mortgage or rent, and divided it by the number of bedrooms you have, you'll know what it costs you per month for that spare room (or more) every month compared to a place with one less bedroom. Is it worth the extra cost? In almost every case, the answer is, "We're moving!"

   Once you've made a dent in your debt, you're not purchasing useless things anymore, and you've gotten your living expenses down by quite a bit, you now have more cash than you used to have. So here's where the dreaming really kicks in because you can almost see it. It's getting closer and closer. The debt is just about paid off, so really get detailed about where you'd like to ultimately live, or how much/little you'd like to travel - and to where, have you always wished you had the time or the money to donate to a charity, church, or good cause? Without buying material things, is there an experience you've dreamed about? Like visiting every Major League Baseball park in the USA? Is it season tickets to your favorite hockey team? How about tickets to a season at the local live theater? What about something more personal? Is there a family member you could help, like taking in an aging, widowed parent so they aren't stuck in a nursing home while you wonder what kind of care they're getting? Have you ever wanted to go to college and become a doctor, dentist, lawyer, teacher, or something else that helps others? Could you volunteer or donate to a soup kitchen or homeless shelter? When you take materialistic things out of the picture, your dreams become so much more exciting. They can be life-changing for you or those you help. Have you ever wanted to learn to play an instrument? Take some cooking classes at a local restaurant and learn to prepare dinner for your guests like a pro? Do you enjoy fishing or hunting? Where would you do it if you had the time and money to do it more often? Have you ever wanted to write a book? Many of the things here are things that could even become income producing for you! Like gardening? Would you enjoy selling your excess produce at a local farmer's market? You'd get to meet new people, exchange ideas for gardening and cooking with the produce, it's how my son met his soon to be wife! We're glad we decided to bake goods and create things to sell at our local market!

     Take a few moments to dream. Maybe just a few minutes in the beginning, then more detailed as you learn to live a more simple life. When you're close to making enough income to cover your now more meager but appropriate expenses, then blow the doors off your dreams! Chase your passions to the fullest extent you're able. All it takes is the spark of a dream, then kindle the flames until you can see it and it's energy moves you.

Living Simply challenge Day 22: Handling Stress

     Today is one of those days I'm not handling stress well. I'm not living a simplified life. I have quite a bit happening in the next 30 days - I just started college to pursue a new career when most people my age are figuring out how to retire soon. Along with that comes a full-time student workload, over 100 pages of reading, homework, quizzes, note taking, and class participation every week. I'm starting up a new small group of women where I facilitate a particular book study. I'm starting in a new bible study myself. I'm having no luck finding a dress to wear to my son's wedding in about a month - no one has my size, and if they do, it's either the same blue as the wedding party, all black, or some horrific ugly print (think over busy geometric designs or bright orange flower patterns). I'm moving my mother and brother here in about 21 days. I have to leave for our 25th anniversary trip we planned almost a year ago before we had any idea there'd by college classes, a wedding, and family moving in that same month! Add to that the frustration knowing one of your adult kids are hurting, trying to deal with an insurance company with no answers about their own plans, a day trip in a few days that involves 6 hours of driving for a 2 hour bridal shower that I thought I had 2 weeks to plan for but the date had to change unexpectedly, did I forget anything?
On top of that, there's the same issues everyone deals with through their own friends and family: people dealing with cancer, losing a spouse, dementia, divorces, deaths, job loss, custody battles, addictions, abuse, out of control kids, and more. So what can you do when your life gets overwhelming? How can you maintain a simple lifestyle amidst the chaos?

INTENTIONALITY

     You've GOT to be INTENTIONAL. What kinds of intentional things can you do? Here's a quick list of things you can try. Many of which I'm going to do as soon as I'm done this post - but I wanted the emotion of it all to be fresh as I write to you.

1.  Stop. Just stop. Stop pacing. Stop driving (pull over somewhere safe, not just stop on the road). Stop thinking of all that's going wrong. Just stop.

2.  Breathe. Take a large, slow, inhaling breath in through your nose. Hold it for a second or two. Then release it slowly out through your mouth. Repeat 5 to 10 times, or until you know you've settled down a bit so you can think.

3.  Think. But think deliberately. Depending on circumstances, what's going on will be very different for you. If it's a health/illness concern, think through some options or preparations. If it's about a job loss, what are your strengths and who could use them? Who's hiring? Can whatever caused the loss or threaten of a loss be fixed before it's permanent? Think through it. If you're fortunate that you're just having a day where you're overwhelmed but nothing's going to cause lifelong devastation, then this is really important. You need to intentionally realize that in 5 years, none of this will matter. In about a month or so, none of this will matter - it'll all be behind you. Will it matter in a week? How about 5 minutes from now. Let go of the littlest frustrations first - like the guy that just cut you off in traffic, or the fact that the store was out of what you needed. Just let go of the thoughts that fan your anger into stress that can hurt you.

4.  Plan. What can you plan to do about your situation(s)? What is within your ability to act or do? What is NOT within your ability or choice? Let that go! I've always taught my kids, "If you can't fix it or change it, move on." What are some proactive things you can do to ease the situation? Can you put together some plans? Maybe even just a loose plan to fix whatever's going on?

5.  De-stress! Whether it's immediately or if it's something you have to schedule into your day or week (or month), intentionally schedule some time to de-stress. It may be to go to the gym or a yoga class. It may be a bubble bath with soft music, candles, and a good book. It could be to just lock your office door, sit on the floor, take your shoes off, and just center yourself. Stretch your neck and shoulder muscles. Take deep breaths. Meditate on or pray about finding a moment of peace in the midst of the storm. Can you go for a walk, hike, run, or bike ride? Can you go to bed early to get some much needed extra rest? Be intentional about taking your stress level down a few notches.

6. Add value. Do things that bring value to your life. What do you enjoy? Is it a nice glass of wine sipped slowly? Do you like to listen to soft jazz to unwind? Is it having coffee with your best friend? Taking the dog for a walk? Playing with your kids without stressing them out? Relaxing with your partner watching a movie together? Maybe you have a hobby? Do you relax by playing an instrument? Gardening time? What about relaxing by the pool? or a bonfire? Do you like to write? Whatever adds value, do it. Bring in those things to your world that bring you joy and contentment.

     At the end of all this, hopefully you're stress will have given way to more peace and less anxiety. Even if the problems you're facing are life-changing, you can learn to live through them by handling stress in the moment in a more intentional, positive way. It's going to be okay eventually.

Living Simply challenge Day 21: Comfort Zones

     Today's challenge is on comfort zones, which is perfect, because today, I am terrified. I'm heading back to college decades after graduating high school. I have kids older than many of the students that will be in my class. I won't look, dress, or talk like they do. I'm slower with technology since they were born with cell phones in their hands. Back in the day, you wrote or typed your homework, brought in a copy, and used actual books to write papers. Now it's all digital files, multiple software programs to get and turn in assignments, and most of the writing is based on online articles instead of physical books. Yeah, I'm dealing with a lot of anxiety here. This is definitely NOT my comfort zone.

     What exactly is a "comfort zone"? It's the way you go through life when you aren't stretching, maturing, trying new things, learning new things, nor growing. It's where you feel at ease, not stressed. It's completely different for everyone. For some, jogging a marathon is a comfort zone because they train and look forward to it. For others, having the same routine day in and day out gives them comfort. Still others have a comfort zone that includes trying new things (picture adrenaline junkies who are perfectly fine with cliff diving off a cliff on the coast of a foreign country). Many people's comfort zones include how their home life is - noisy, very quiet, always people dropping by, never having people over, etc. It also includes school and/or work for most people. Doing their job is a comfort zone because they know what's expected of them and what to expect in return (their paycheck). Unfortunately, there are also bad comfort zones, like a battered woman who won't leave the relationship because it's scarier to think about how to get by alone than with a "known quantity" that she's gotten used to. Other bad comfort zones may include being stuck in alcoholism or drug use, where you choose to surround yourself with people also spiraling downward in many ways, but it's "comfortable" - and it would be stressful to imagine getting cleaned up, doing without the drinks or drugs, and trying to mix with what you've termed as "normal people".
Your comfort zone is whatever you've made it to be - but know this:

YOU ARE NOT STUCK IN IT FOREVER. YOU HAVE A CHOICE. YOU CAN CHOOSE TO EXPAND IT AND CREATE A BETTER LIFE FOR YOURSELF.

(And being a minimalist or living simply doesn't mean you simply accept your fate in a comfort zone that keeps you from living the life you've always wanted.)

     So how do you expand your comfort zone to begin living simply, intentionally creating the life you want to have? Baby steps. Want to meet new people, take a local class to learn a new skill set, maybe through a school, a library, an arts & crafts store, or a business - like a cooking class. How about changing jobs? Take baby steps towards gathering information in the field you're interested in. Want to get in shape but taking a full on Zumba or yoga class is intimidating? Find online videos for free you can download/watch in private until you're comfortable with the moves. Thought of writing a book? Take a writing class, sit down to write something every day, and gather info about freelance writing of small articles or blogs for a media outlet. 

     The only way to live a simple life is to purposefully do things that will bring you joy and to change or get rid of obstacles that stop you. Intentionally move in the direction you want to go and little by little, you'll build the simple life you want, fulfilling your purpose and chasing your passions. Don't let fear stop you. Take one step at a time until you've stretched your comfort zone into including your new pursuits. You got this! 

Living simply challenge Day 20: Envy

     I've been wanting to write on this topic for a while now, trying to figure out in my head exactly how to word it. I walked into church today and that was the exact message! I may steal a few key points or phrases from there mixed with my usual take on things. It's not a preachy message - but it is a warning against consumerism and allowing yourself to be driven by advertising and marketing.

   

 Envy:  1. a feeling of discontent or covetousness with regard to another's advantages, success, possessions, etc. It's what drives our culture through the ads we see and the marketing think groups who's sole purpose is to target YOU. The average person comes across 4,000 to 10,000 ads PER DAY!!! That may seem like an impossibility when you think, "but I don't watch much television and I don't live in a big city with billboards," but what about on social media? How many ads do you see, even if it's just subconsciously around the borders of what you're reading? Are you on more than one platform? Facebook - twitter - instagram - and don't forget junk emails...the backstops of rural kids' ballparks, in the windows of the local stores, signs out front on your area's main street, newspapers, phone solicitations, it's endless! What do they all have in common? They are designed to get you to part with your money for something you don't need. Their job is to convince you a "want" is a "need", and it's working.

   

 Back in the day, envy was up there with malice and greed. It was a vice (defined as an immoral or evil practice). Nowadays, envy is a virtue (a particular moral excellence)! What the hell happened?!
You can say you're not an envious person, but almost all of us fall into its trap at some point in our life. Have you ever been going along throughout your day, thinking everything's good, you feel happy, you're enjoying life, then you come across someone who's say, driving a car that gets your attention? Suddenly you're not so happy, especially with what you're driving. You start to think about how that driver is probably some spoiled trust fund baby, or they do dishonest things to get it. You're much more deserving than they are. Your want just turned into a need. You've lost the joy you had.

     What about when you're out in public? You stop at a nice little outdoor spot for lunch, enjoying the nice day and the time to enjoy it. You look good, you feel good. It's a good day. Then you spot a table across from you where the customers are wearing expensive clothes, dripping with status symbol jewelry pieces, she's got a purse you know is worth over $500, and of course, they're scrolling on the latest greatest version of the newest, most expensive cell phone while waiting for their meal. What goes through your head? Is it that you're happy someone is succeeding in this crazy world? Is it that you're so filled with joy that they have their life together? No. Be honest. You know you're thinking about comparisons. Why do THEY have those things? You work hard - harder by the looks of "them". Now you're rationalizing (which are just RATIONAL LIES) why they have what they do and you don't, without ever having met nor talked to them. Your own joy for the day is stolen.

     Want to know if you have envy in your heart? Ask yourself these 2 questions:     

1.  Are you unable to enjoy what someone else has or has done? 

2. Are you unable to enjoy what YOU have? (Are you content?) 

     

Envy starts with one single thought, "Why him/her and not ME?"  We have been so programmed by advertising and consumerism to live in a frenzied state of trying to out-do everyone else around us. It leads to depression, health issues, financial struggles, loss of relationships, and for what? Just to own stuff we never intended on purchasing until we were manipulated into thinking we HAD to have it. We've become a culture that gets its self-worth from the useless things we clutter and hoard around us. This cycle of buying for that drug type of momentary euphoria, the huge let down very shortly afterwards, and the drive to go buy for that "high" again - it's destroying society. It's a prison and you become it's slave, a slave to the emotions produced by an industry of strangers to make you feel resentful of other strangers around you, all so they can put their kids in private schools and drive fancy cars. Wake up and see envy for what it is!

     You'll never experience joy in this life, at home, in your relationships, or in your world at all if you're constantly thinking, "If only I bought a ____________, " or "maybe I should go get a _______" you fill in the blank.If you're reading this and you see a little of yourself or someone you know in it, start taking some baby steps to break out of the prison, learn how to regain your freedom. Freeing yourself of material envy is something that's so hard to describe to others. You truly need to experience it for yourself. If you need help, there are 19 days of Living Simply daily challenges, or baby steps, you can take here on this blog. There's also a 30 day Minimalism challenge on here that I just did in July. If you still need help, you can to go The Minimalists website and read some of their essays or listen to a few podcasts. You also can find some good information on Joshua Becker's website here.