Photo Challenge: Day 18

Okay, it's hard to write about me. I've spent years scrapbooking and journaling about others around me, always from behind the scenes. But I do realize that this photo challenge is to capture our world - and since I feel it's my job to tie it all together and make it work on a daily basis - I'll include a brief snapshot into ME.

I can't write about myself because I know me differently than how others see me (they aren't in my head hearing my thoughts, fears, and hopes). Instead, I'll just give a list of words that describe me, my likes, my habits, my world. Here goes:

Pink (the color, not the singer), denim, scrapbooking, 80's, Phantom of the Opera, Air 1 radio, my faith, open book, reading, cooking, "doing tea", coffee, vanilla not chocolate, sunshine, tanning, encourager, swimming, palm trees, no snow, hate the cold, family, building memories, couponing, homeschooling, Facebook, Zumba, Monavie, learning, friends, extended family, board games, loyal, helpful, teaching, bible studies, writing, blogging, motorcycle rides with Tim, dogs, bubble gum flavored anything, sneakers over heels, roller skating, ice skating, Chinese food, Greek anything, life is funny, humor over jokes, detailed planner, organization, the answer person, solution oriented, clean house, organics, non-GMO, conservative republican but respect others' rights to think differently, share my faith but not pushy or judgemental, lunch with Mom, and long phone conversations with Tim while he's on the road.

Photo Challenge: Day 17

Logan...if Jordan is a "mini me" in her appearance, then Logan is a "mini Tim" in his. They look so much alike, but they're so different in so many ways.

Tim: introvert, quick to judge, snap decisions, always running late or taking a long time to get things done, prefers to stay home and watch superhero cartoons & movies.

Logan: extrovert, accepts everyone where they're at, agonizes over decisions, ready to run out the door in a flash to be with friends, hates staying home, likes the latest, greatest, action movies.

They see people differently. They empathize with others (or not) differently. They have very different opinions on things. Their idea of fun varies quite a bit. But yet, they actually have so much in common. They share many of the same strengths:

Both: Are loyal to those they love most, are very hard-working, have very inventor/engineering minds, understand physics like no one else I've ever met, share the same hobbies (like shooting, camping, playing guitar, etc.), and come to the rescue when someone needs help. They are the last 2 boy scouts in my book. As Tim once put it, "I even change tires for UGLY women." They'll get the door for the elderly person behind them, they'll ask if someone needs help when they see them looking around confused. They're first to jump in at an event when they call for volunteers to help set up or tear down the room. They're both very, very smart about a wide variety of things. And in a survival situation - my money's on them.

I treasure my homeschooling years to really, intimately, know all the little details about each family member. I know their strengths, weaknesses, hopes, dreams, failures, lessons learned, points of views, and most of all...I know their hearts.

I see so much more when I look at this picture. I see a Father and Son, and all that goes into being who they are.

Photo Challenge: Day 16

Raising the First-Born...They say the oldest of the siblings grows up to be more driven, more responsible, and more independent. In my experience, I find that to be true. I'm the oldest, so is Tim, so you'd expect that we'd understand Adam, our own first-born better, right? Also, my personality is a Melancholy (the thinker, planner, list-maker & organizer). That's the same as Adam's main personality too, except that his can often border on OCD, but he's doing much better these days.

So why so many struggles as we were raising Adam? I think it's the being independent that really makes the difference. He's always been a hard worker and more responsible than anyone else his age (more than most adults, to be honest), but that independent streak is so strong in him! We have a great relationship because I've homeschooled him. I've been there for everything in his life. I've never missed a sporting practice, game, tournament, play, or anything else important to him. We've had thousands of hours to discuss life, politics, faith, dating, life skills, careers, personalities, academics, music, friends, plans for the future and disappointments. Tim, unfortunately, had to be gone for most of his childhood to provide a living so I was ABLE to do those things for our kids. That put them on very different sides of almost every issue for about 5 years.

Adam begged to work at an early age so he could be responsible and buy himself those things he wanted just weren't in our budget - brand name shoes, skinny jeans, video games, movies with friends - to his credit, he's never asked us for a penny for anything - not even once that I remember. If he wanted or needed it, he found a way to earn it. Anyway, being in a new environment where people were lazy, selfish, and had little if any character traits worth copying, changed Adam. He stopped appreciating what he had and instead, complained because his life wasn't as "easy" as he thought his friends had it. Granted they may have had parents buy them more stuff, or they took vacations to exotic places, but Adam failed to see that they lived in a home with an alcoholic, or drugs, or had been through rough divorces in their home, or never had either parent around - which led to life-altering poor choices in these kids' lives.

Then we had to move to the mountains. Although it was pretty traumatic for him to leave his friends, have to quit his job and be broke, live in a very isolated, rural area with nothing much for teenagers to do...it did do a lot of good as well. He learned to appreciate what he had. He began to see the poor choices of others for what they were, and how they led to bigger issues down the road. He learned to work hard again after thinking he could be lazy and "deserved" to make the salary of an experienced professional at the inexperienced age of 16 (I believe his words were, "I'm all done with physical labor and minimum wage jobs." - at 16!!!). Over those 2 years, he grew, matured, learned, and worked. When we returned to the Valley, he came back happy, out-going, willing to do physical work at odd hours for things he needed.

Over the last few years, Tim too has undergone changes. He's had time to rest from almost 15 years in high-stress sales jobs and working 60 - 70 hour work weeks. He had time to live where there's space, open sky, clean air and water, and to sleep in - a lot! He's also grown and matured. He let go of selfishness and trying to have so much control over others that he was micromanaging everyone and everything. Now he's in a job where he's gone a lot, and it gets lonely, but when he's home, he's really home and with us. He's not overly stressed, doesn't do a lot of physical (although he works hard in spurts, it's not a taxing job all the time). He gets plenty of sleep and rest. And when he's home, he wants to be with us, doing family things together, and he's learned to appreciate his children, and their individual personalities and strengths. He's more accepting of their weaknesses as he's learned to understand his own. He's become the husband and father I've always known he could be.

So here we are about 4 years later. Tim and Adam, his first-born, now on a new journey to discover each other all over again, through new perspectives. Each learning how valuable the other is, and both appreciating their time together.

I love this picture of them sharing a moment together and smiling. Although Logan looks more like Tim on the outside, I see lots of Tim in Adam, on the inside. And I love them both.

Photo Challenge: Day 15

Still Daddy's Girl - Jordan has always been very clingy with me, but she's always been Daddy's Girl, too. When she was an infant and a toddler, she was Punki-doo to him. She would race to the door to be the first to greet Tim when he got home from work. She would sneak into the room (with my permission first) to tickle his toes sticking out from the edge of the blanket to wake him up in the morning. She watched cartoons and movies from his lap instead of just on the sofa or floor.

Once she was starting school, she became "Monkey Duck" to Daddy. I'm not sure where it came from, I think I'd feel insulted being called a Monkey Duck but she always liked it. She even used it as a password for a game page she used to go to. Maybe it's just knowing she was special to her Daddy? That he picked her name just for her, and only to be used by him. She knew she "belonged" to him.

In the early teen years, Jordan's been more independent and moody, as expected. She's had lots of times when her own insecurities and Tim's stress levels caused them to drift apart a little, but her new name is "Chickie". Now I think I gave that to her, but maybe I got it from Tim, not sure - but it defines yet another season of her life.

Now that Tim's home time is special and he's changed so much that he's a joy to be around, she's once again, Daddy's Girl. She wants to talk to him on the phone when he calls. She wants to cook and bake things for him when he's home. She wants to go with me to pick him up. And I even notice how she dresses up for his arrivals and departures.

I don't know what her new nickname will be once she's an adult, done with school, but I'm sure they'll have a new pet name he'll call her, and she'll plan dates with him to have coffee, or lunch, or to feed the ducks in the park.

I aggressively protect my relationship with Tim, but with Jordan, I don't mind sharing him with her one bit.

Photo Challenge: Day 14

This photo challenge is to take time to enjoy the everyday moments around me. One of the highlights of our family's month is when Tim comes home for a few days. Things run pretty smooth while he's on the road for 2 to 3 weeks at a time, but when he's home, we change things up quite a bit.

We have a ton of errands to do when he first gets home so he can leave for his next trip fully stocked with things he needs to make his trip more successful. It means grocery store runs, Dollar stores, usually some kind of new tool to make his job easier, and a trip to American Discount Foods. They buy out other grocery stores' and restaurants' inventories and sell great stuff, brand names, high quality items - but at a fraction of the cost.

Anyway, after the initial errands are run, we stop having any type of schedule and just let Tim relax and play it by ear. We take time to eat a sit-down meal together as a family. We take time to watch movies on Netflix or from the library. We may go to the park, or walk around Ikea for ideas, or walk around some stores for exercise. We just let our days unfold while he's home, since it's only a day or two that he gets to rest and feel like he's been on vacation.

It's sad when he has to leave again, but this new schedule has made all 5 of us appreciate each other more. The kids have learned to follow my leadership, I've learned to give each of them individual attention where they're at, the kids miss Tim while he's gone and want to be around when he's home, and when Tim's here, he's actually "all here" with us. He's not stressing over not being at work like when he was in sales. He's calm, more understanding, less demanding, and enjoys doing things together as a family - as well as making time for just the two of us to be alone too.

We miss him, and someday he won't have to be gone so much, but for now, I think it's what we all needed to get where we are right now, and it's what's best for everyone. I appreciate Tim's sacrifices that he's made and continues to make to provide us with a wonderful home, in a great neighborhood, living where we want to live, with the resources we need. I pray that I never take it for granted.

Photo Challenge: Day 13

You know what I love about our new home? It's comfortable. I feel so relaxed when I'm at home. Maybe it's all the neutral colors? Maybe it's because everything is new and in great working order? Maybe because it's the nicest home we've had since Dover, NH back in 2003? I don't really know, but I love being at home.

I can nap or read on my bed and be at peace in my room. I can stay focused and clear-headed typing away at my kitchen table, I can feel God's peace as I read my bible in my chair on the back patio, I can relax completely sitting on the sofa watching a movie with one of the kids, I even feel contentment as I fold laundry in the new laundry room.

They say a man's home is his castle. I say for this woman, my home is my refuge, my place to ease into the mornings, rest and restore my soul during the night, and create great memories with my family and friends during the days.

Even Furlough has her favorite spots to relax and take a nap - like hiding in the dark corner of my room in the laundry basket.

Photo Challenge: Day 12

Reinventing or Rediscovering?

Logan is like many teens (and adults)...he's always in the process of reinventing himself - or is it just rediscovering?

Reinventing fits, because he tries new hairstyles, new clothes, with or without hats, new styles of music, new guitar techniques, new circle of friends, and more.

I also think rediscovering works because I've watched Logan through the years. He actually cycles through things. He's got habits, mannerisms, key phrases, interests, and more that he changes, but tends to return to a few years later.

Right now, he's broadening his guitar playing to include some classical, some jazzy-sounding riffs, and he's backing off some of the more modern metal-sounding songs. He's recently changed his hairstyle again to a more front-sweeping style instead of just having it hang straight down - I like it better now. He spent a long time wearing a hand-crocheted cap from his grandmother, but now he's wearing a fedora style hat wherever he goes. He always recycles his interests in 80s music and vintage games he played as a little boy.

I don't know how long it'll take him to find who he thinks he really is and feel comfortable with where he's at. Some people spend a lifetime trying to figure it out, but I think he's getting closer. I think once he does, he'll rediscover what I've known all along...who he is deep down is a wonderful, loving, caring, highly intelligent, engineering, helpful, hard-working, out-going, man of God who could change the world if he really wanted to.

Photo Challenge: Day 11

Finding the perfect pair of jeans fixes everything, doesn't it? We don't have the money right now to buy big name jeans, so we just keep an eye out for a pair that might fit better than sweatpants and don't cost a fortune.

Jordan found this pair while we were in the Goodwill at the corner. Where else can you find jeans in great shape (if you search carefully) for just $7.99?! (Or half that if it's got the right colored price tag). Jordan found a pair that made her legs look thinner and longer and when she put them on, something magical seemed to happen to her. She came out of her room with her head held high, feeling more confident, just KNOWING that she looked good in them. Now when she wants to look and feel her best, these are her go-to jeans.

Yes, the perfect pair of jeans fixes everything...well, almost. But that's close enough.

Photo Challenge: Day 10

Oh, how we love to swim! Maybe it's because we were born on the seacoast. Maybe it's the heat here. Either way, our family loves to swim. Especially me and my 2 youngest. We do miss having a pool right outside our front door like we did in the condo a few years ago, but there's so many pools here that finding a place to swim isn't a problem. We have several lakes that aren't too far away, public pools that are actually managed better and cleaned more often than those I grew up in back in Massachusetts. There's also lots of friends & neighbors here with pools that invite us over to swim now and then.

This particular pool is just about a mile and a half from our house. It's only $1 for Logan & Jordan and $2.75 for me - where else can you spend a day for just $4.75 of our entertainment budget?

Jordan likes to swim, Logan enjoys the 2 water slides there, and I love tanning - so this place, especially because it's only 5 minutes away, is perfect!

Photo Challenge: Day 9

There's always something new or different to see around here. Sometimes it's a plant or flower we've never seen. Other times, it's a home feature you'd never find in New England. Sometimes it's a bug or spider that you don't want to ever see again. On this particular day, the "strange scene of the day" was a guy up in a tree quite a few stories high, trimming off all the dead branches off a tree on the next street. You know how it is...you wake up to the sound of a chain saw, and something inside you has to go see where it's coming from. I'm not sure why, but it will stay in the forefront of my mind unless I make a point to see what's going on. Well, I found it - I'm glad Tim doesn't have to do THAT for a living!