What an interesting challenge this is in light of all The Minimalists books, videos on YouTube, and podcasts I've been absorbing. I have to really give this one thought because it's not about being the best at what others need from you, or what others want you to do or be. It's about figuring out what I'm truly passionate about. It's not about what "job" should I have, or what "career" do I want (although there's one I'm pursuing I am passionate about); instead it's about what motivates me, what would I do if I had the time to do it, even if it didn't pay me a penny.
Over the last 20 years I knew the answer of the tip of my tongue - HOMESHOOLING. It paid me nothing, cost us quite a bit of sacrificing, took most of my time, but it was important. It came with a whole slew of rewards that money can't buy, mostly my close relationships I have with each of my grown children, each one is totally different but all are just as deep. I woke up every day knowing what I did mattered. It mattered to me, to the kids, and when they become adults, it will matter to the world beginning with their bosses, spouses and kids (someday), their volunteer and charity organizations they choose to support, their logical thinking, problem solving abilities, hard work ethic, compassion, the list goes on and on.
After graduating our last a year ago I really spent all this time considering what it is I'm supposed to do in this new season of my life. I could go get some minimum wage job, trading most of my hours for a few dollars, to buy stuff we don't need. I suppose I could use it to save for our next (used) car or a future vacation, but what would I lose in the process? The answer I came to was: MYSELF
I need to be able to make a difference in what I'm doing. It needs to help people. It needs to have a purpose other than making money for some faceless corporation. I don't judge anyone working a minimum wage job because in many cases, it's paying the bills, or provided the extras their families can't get any other way, or helping them get out of credit card debt, or paying for medical expenses. In my particular case, I needed to follow my true calling, my passion, the purpose I believe God put me on this earth to accomplish. My heart is 100% in Women's Ministry. So what are my new priorities based on that?
1. I'm going back to college 30 years after I had to leave (ran out of money back then). I'm
taking Psychology to focus on Counseling, which I hope to bring to Women's Ministry. I'd
love to do that in my own home church, but in any church, I'll be pursuing my passion. If
I can't do that, I can still be a counselor in a non-profit organization. Worst case, I can still
work in Human Resources at any company and earn a decent living compared to min. wage.
2. I'm moving my mother (and brother) here from FL to AZ. She's not all that old, and she
isn't in such bad health that she belongs in a nursing home or assisted living center. I just
know how badly she and my brother have struggled over the decades now just to survive
and the rug is being pulled out from under them through no fault of their own. I believe our
family has been through what it has, and we own the larger home we have now, so that we
can be a blessing to them and give them a new start. Where would we be if my in-laws
hadn't stepped in when that was us? It's our turn to give back and pay it forward.
3. I have an opportunity to grow with a new church that took over our building when the last
one had to close its doors. I'm so excited about every aspect of it so far. I hope to really be
able to thrive, as well as help other women thrive, through the Women's Ministries and small
group opportunities they offer. I can truly pursue my heart's passion through them.
4. I have a great marriage. Like most couples, there's been a few times in 25 years that it wasn't
great, when one of us felt like giving up, fortunately it was never on the same day! We've been
through a lot and I won't speak for what Tim feels about it all now, but I know I've come
through the messes to the other side with a wonderful new appreciation and respect for Tim.
My faith helped me stick with it during the challenges, but now, I know without a doubt, I
CHOOSE to stay, every day, because I love Tim deeply, want him to be happy, and want to
never forget about his needs and desires. I seek to put even more into our marriage. On his
home time he usually just wants to rest watching tv, catching up on all the shows he misses
being gone for 3 weeks at a time (or more). I plan on coming up with some things to do
together besides tv that will appeal to him - as well as spend more time just being his friend
and companion watching some of his shows with him. And I can't wait for our 25th
Anniversary cruise that we're taking (4 months after the fact) in September to the Southern
Caribbean. I love cruising alone with him!
5. Number 5 for me is at a crossroads. Health is important to me, so I exercise, eat a mostly
gluten free diet (a low carb tortilla a week is about it), take supplements, avoid all forms of
sugar except Stevia and a little monkfruit, cut out all candy/chocolate/baked goods unless
they're remade with a Trim Healthy Mama recipe, and barely eat some type of chips once a
month - and I'm currently trying to perfect a recipe for homemade oven sweet potato chips.
With that said, after considering all I've read and heard from The Minimalists, health is one
the most important things, but if it's something you're passionate about, don't do it. I'm not
passionate about exercising, I'd rather just have a Dunkin' Donut or bubble gum ice cream
or salt and vinegar chips once in a while - but I don't because I want the results. I want to
drop a few sizes, lose some inches, feel better, live longer, have more energy, think more
clearly, get sick less often, etc. but I'm not yet "passionate" about it. I'm hoping that as I keep
up what I'm doing, I'll learn to enjoy it, or at least, I'll see results that give me more passion
for continuing.
So there's my Day 5 challenge priorities. As I typed this out and reread it all, I really do feel excitement in what I say I'm passionate about. If I were to add a #6 it would be travel. It's all I ever really wanted to do but never got much of a chance until about 6 years ago. I choose to get my finances in better order (although they're very good now) before taking off somewhere again. I'll be
more than satisfied with my cruise, then maybe it'll be time for some local travel to see CA or CO.
Maybe big trips will become rewards that are earned for getting my college degree(s)? Or after I
have all the money saved up and I'm completely debt-free except for our mortgage? We'll see where that goes, but I've got enough to work on with priorities #1-5.
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