Can't wait until February!

2011 has gotten off to a slow start for me. I have lots of plans for this year but it seems most the things I want to implement are on hold waiting for something else to happen first. The one thing on track is my weight loss. I'm down 19 pounds since the beginning of November, not bad for just 2 1/2 months. Hopefully soon things will start happening so I can work my way down my Resolutions list.

Another reason I can't wait for February is that it starts to get warmer up here. It's about 23 right now, granted it's 5 a.m., but the nights are still in the teens/20s and although we had a couple of days in the 50s, most of the time it's only in the high 30s/low 40s. Once we hit a few weeks into February, we should be in the mid 50s most of the time. The nights will still be cold in the 20s, but the single digits and teens should be over.

The best reason for February is that it holds my two boys' birthdays. One turns 15 and one turns 17 (and should have his license by then). That should give BOTH of us some more freedom. As much as I'm trying to treasure every single day with my boys, I'm not one of those mothers that doesn't want their kids to grow up and go out into the world. I want the best for them, and keeping them babies forever isn't what's best for them. I can't wait to see what career path they follow, who they'll marry, what kind of fathers they'll become, and what mistakes we made that they learned to avoid. I'm so proud of both of them. They're both so smart, they're hard workers, and they care deeply about their friends and family (even if a 17 year old has trouble expressing it like an adult would sometimes.)

I didn't forget about my daughter. Although she's growing up fast, 12 1/2 now, I know that I still have 6 years to teach her, another 6 or more before she moves out, and so much still to experience. I don't feel rushed to savor every single moment in the same way that I do the boys. I've only got 1 year left with Adam before he goes off to college (if he can find the money), Logan may stick around longer, but if not, I've only got 3 more to teach him all I can to survive and thrive in the real world. Jordan has lots of time to shadow me and learn what to do. She seems to love sewing, cooking, and baking. She's hates school work. The best I can do is train her up to be a great wife, mother and keeper of her home - and continue to encourage her in her academic and potential career pursuits.

Maybe I'm not in SUCH a rush for February to come after all?

Glad he's back

I think it's only fair after posting why I had a good week with Tim gone, that I should now post why it's so good that he's back home with us.

1. I really enjoy sitting on the couch at the end of the day and watching a movie or an episode of Law & Order. We have no television here so movies are all we have. We watch movies and boxed sets of tv shows that have been given to or borrowed by Tim's parents. I watch movies with the kids, and by myself, but when I'm with Tim, it's better. We hold hands, or lean into each other, or sit close under my favorite Mexican blanket if it's really cold in our living room.

2. It's nice to know that if I need something done that's too hard for me, or if I don't have time to get done before I have to leave somewhere, Tim's always willing to help me, or do the job for me. He doesn't complain about it at all.

3. It's great to have a second driver when it's an hour and a half to take Adam to work and back - or to pick him up at 11:00 at night so far away. He never complains about getting the late driving shift.

4. He came home with a very positive, excited attitude about his new corporate position he was offered in CA. It's great to see him looking forward to setting up, running and supervising such a large operation - and knowing he'll have the flexibility to do it his way (for the most part). He's smart and now he'll have a chance to prove it, while providing an excellent income for us.

5. He's really come a long way on his journey. In bible study together on Sunday, I was realizing how well he knows his bible, how he "gets it", and how he understands how to apply it to our lives here in this day and age. All that is very important to me, but up until now, we never were in the same bible study together except for a small group with friends. That was great too, but it ended years ago when we all had to head in different directions.

There's probably a long list of other reasons why it's good that he's home, but in the middle of all I'm doing today, these are the ones that really come to mind first.

He seems a little more willing to try not to stress out the rest of us, more calm, more patient...I'm sure we all hope it lasts as he embarks on his newest adventure. If it's successful, it'll give us more options, and more visits to the valley, and more fun times to share with the kids. God only knows how much they've had to deal with because of our financial difficulties. I can't wait to share fun times, vacations, and rewards with them!

What a good week!

This week, Tim & his father are in CA on business. That gives me quite the reprieve. Don't get me wrong, I love that Tim works from home now and is here when we need him, but here's a few reasons why I also enjoy this week:

1. I have a perfectionist personality. I want things done the way I've thought it out and planned and decided is the best way to get it done. I'm not always right, he often is, but when he does something that's not my way, (especially in "MY KITCHEN"), I get frustrated and stressed. It's like me telling him what to do in HIS workshop area, right? It's my problem more than his, I admit that, but still...this week, I'm neither frustrated, nor stressed.

2. I'm sleeping the best I have in years! Tim tosses and turns, and if he wakes up in the middle of the night, something in him says, "Quick! Stand up and go walk around!" He doesn't even know why he does it. Sometimes it's just a quick trip to the bathroom, sometimes in the kitchen for a snack or just a drink of water, but it wakes me up, and then I'm up for hours trying to fall back to sleep while he passes out immediately. This week, I'm in bed at 9 if I'm not picking up Adam. 12am if I am picking him up. Then I sleep right through until 7 or 7:30! In the past 18 years, I've slept in 45 minute to 2 hour intervals - it's so nice to sleep straight through!

3. Food. When Tim's here, I never know when he'll eat, when he won't, when he'll have his RVL shake, when he's starving...it's hard to plan around him. I end up making too much, or not enough (and feeling guilty), etc. This week, I only worry about me. The kids take care of their own breakfast and lunch, and with Adam working nights, I only have to prepare for 2. No being around food all day long. No temptations to snack as I make other people's meals every two hours because no one follows the schedule for eating I planned (see #1).

4. Time. I try to be the best wife/mother/teacher/housekeeper I can be (again, see #1). When Tim's here, I feel guilty any time I sit down to read, journal, relax at the computer, watch a movie before 8pm, etc. With him gone, I'm free to go through my day working on those important but not urgent things I want to do more often but don't take the time to do. Again, Tim doesn't make me feel guilty about this, I do. Without him, the pressure's off.

5. Kids. When Tim's around, especially in conjunction with Dad, often they walk around all stressed out, or leaving trails of their Alpha Male personalities all over the place. It stresses the kids out. Typical American teens, the kids assume if they make eye contact with either of the men, they'll be assigned some physical labor, so they spend lots of time out of sight. This week, they've been around more, bedroom doors open, more talkative,...it's been great. It feels like we're so close these days. Again, I don't want you to think badly of Tim. It's just that teens will do anything to get out of doing "extra", right?

6. Schooling. Because there's a low-stress factor going on this week, and Tim's not here to run loud YouTube videos during the kids' reading & school time, they're more focused this week, more reading's getting done without so much prodding, and the kids are retaining more than usual. Tim doesn't do anything to distract them on purpose, it's just that he doesn't like headphones, I guess. And to be fair, if I ask him to turn it down, he either will, or will then put on headphones, or even go upstairs to use the computer there. He's almost always willing to do the right thing. It's just nice not to have to make him feel bad by asking.

I think my next post will be all the reasons why it's not so good that Tim's gone. Wouldn't that be the fair thing to do?

Memories

This has been a good week. I've had lots of moments to reflect on memories of my kids. Adam's been busy between school and his new job, and being a typical almost 17 year old, I've only spent time with him on the drive to/from work, and in our History discussion at school.

Logan & Jordan on the other hand...I know they're 12 and almost 15, but this week was a week of reminiscing. They did things they haven't done for years. Maybe out of bordom, maybe because neither have friends that are close enough to come over. Anyway, this week they watched the oldest Veggie Tales videos with me. If you haven't watched these, you should. They teach important lessons to kids but there's one-liners thrown in to amuse the adults as well. Being older, my kids caught lots of the jokes they never did when they watched as younger kids. I think even they were surprised that they remembered the words to the songs.

I also heard them playing hide & seek one day. It's a big house, so you really can play a good game here. It made me think of how they used to play in NH. Because Adam was the oldest, and his personality makes him quite the loner, Logan & Jordan were the two that always played together once Adam hit about 10. It was fun to hear them playing games and laughing together again.

I also caught them sitting together on Logan's floor building things out of his enormous Lego collection. No fighting. No bossing each other around like usual. Just two siblings, playing side by side, sharing time together.

I'm so thankful for the chance to reflect on a simpler time in our life when they were younger. Although I homeschooled and never missed a moment of their growing up, it still happened too fast and I often wish for the chance to relive a few days with them when they were younger.

Hang onto every moment with your children. Soon they'll be moved out and you'll wish you had. Appreciate the blessing while you can.

Time for Tea

I love to just sit and talk with the most special people in my world, accompanied by a cup of tea. Not the tea bag grocery store stuff - real loose-leaf tea. There's something about it that makes even just sitting and talking seem special. Yesterday I got to do that with Tim's Mom.

You would think living in the same house, we'd all be sick of seeing each other by now, but the way the house is laid out, there's sometimes DAYS that I don't see Mom. We each are a blend of 2 personalities, and one of those two, we share. That allows us to understand what the other feels in different circumstances, why we responded or reacted to it the way we did, why certain things get on our nerves, and what things mean the most to us. We spent two full hours just relaxing, getting caught up on the latest news, sipping a decaf. vanilla tea from our special teacups and saucers. We talked by the fireplace (the only warm spot in the house these days). I bet she spent lots of time just sitting and talking with her Mom a while back - now it's my turn to sit and talk with her. Sometimes we invite Jordan to join us, and she was only a few feet away on the computer, but it was good to have adult conversation without the constant interrupting of a 12 year old pretending to understand all we're discussing :-)

It was the great event of my day, until her cats began racing overhead (we talked an hour past their usual feeding time). When we stood up, we gave each other a hug, hopefully both feeling a bit more relieved and relaxed, and for the rest of the day, I felt like I'd done something special and memorable that day - and it didn't cost a penny!

Down 16 pounds!

Today is a happy day! In about 8 weeks, I've lost 16 pounds and still going! I don't have to kill myself at the gym, give up taste, or starve all day. It's the new product line RVL from Monavie that's really making it drop off fast. I'm only using half the system (and some days I miss taking my shake because we aren't home). I'm eating healthy around the shake, and when I eat my "sensible meals", I'm following The Maker's Diet, which isn't a diet, doesn't restrict calories, just avoids sugars, preservatives and processed foods. I can eat 2 eggs, scrambled with onions, peppers and mushrooms, with an ounce of goat cheese, and turkey bacon. Then for lunch I can have coconut-mushroom soup, a generous salad with homemade dressing, with any kind of meat in it I want (but not nitrate-filled deli meats), and a shake for supper. With RVL, I can either snack on bars that are part of the system, or a Special K 90 cal. bar, or berries with some organic plain yogurt and a dab of honey.

The only exercising I get lately is walking around the house (about 1 1/2 to 2 miles a day, according to my pedometer), going for a walk (3 miles) outside when it's warm enough, and walking through grocery stores & WalMart when I'm in town.

This is the best thing that's happened to me in a long time - and you know what? - Tim's down 39 pounds so far and almost to his goal! He weighs less now than when he was a young teenager! It's the lowest he remembers weighing.

If you want to get healthy too, you should consider the RVL program.

Skype

I'm a person who hates the telephone. I would much rather text or type on Facebook chat with someone. I'm not sure why, maybe because growing up there were so many bill collectors that when it rang, my mother would say, "Don't answer that!". Yes, that was before the world of caller-ID.

Anyway, I've always been especially close with my sister, Alana, but I haven't been with her in a year and a half. Today we were able to use skype to not only talk, but to see each other. She talked to all the kids first, said hi to Tim briefly, then we got to talk. It was so nice to see her expressions as she talked, it helped us understand that Boston accent we've been away from for so long!

It wasn't perfect, it got all pixel-y, we lost sound quality towards the end, only picking up about every 10th word. Good thing I read lips pretty well. Anyway, it was a lot more fun than a phone call, and I hope I get to do it again soon. I usually walk away after a phone call getting back to what I was doing. This time, I really feel like I spent time with her.

Thank you Skype for bringing me closer to my sister.

1-1-11: Happy New Year!

So what will 2011 hold? Hopefully lots of positive changes! This is the year that Tim & I both lose weight for good, we're already down so much - almost 50 pounds between the 2 of us! It's also going to be a good year for Adam, since he just got a job. He'll have money to get a license, put gas in the jeep, and find some new freedom. No more complaining about being stuck in the house. I think this year will be one filled with new career opportunities for us, while really taking off in our Monavie business. The new weight management system is proven now, we personally know it works, and we're looking forward to helping lots of our friends and family get healthier! School is going smoothly, so I'm not worried about finishing up the second half of this year, but next year will be sad. Adam will be in his senior year. I'd like to be able to hang onto him for another few years, but I know things happen the way they should. He needs to grow up, go to college, get out on his own, make some mistakes, learn from them, and figure out who and what he's really all about. 2010 was so bad that I have nothing but high hopes for 2011.

Not how you picture Arizona?

What a different winter this has been for us. Although we lived in NH til 2003, the kids were so small, that all they remember really is the Phoenix area's warm winters. It's when we get out and do things. It's the best weather of the year! They don't remember staying in 7 to 8 months out of the year because of cold, snow and days of downpouring rain.

This winter, we're in Concho in the White Mountains. It's cold here! Granted, it's not like NH with a "high for the day" of zero degrees with a -10 wind chill, but it's cold here right now. If we're lucky, the high for the day will reach the low 20s. The house is 60 degrees with a good fire in the fireplace and the blower on. There's 4 to 6 inches of snow on the ground (hard to say since it's SOOO windy that it blows and creates uneven drifts everywhere). Yesterday we drove Adam into work, only his 2nd day on the job. We live 30 miles away and he was there 10 min. before he was supposed to be there, even though we got stuck going 20 mph behind a snowplow, and drove through literally white-out conditions, and had to travel through some unplowed areas. His boss who lives just 3 miles down the road? She was 2 hours late! Had I not sat in that parking lot for the whole 2 hours, another employee who walked to work would've been outside the whole time, at about 30 degrees! Anyway, don't get me started on my responsibility soap box. I'm just glad we're teaching Adam that he's responsible to do his work no matter what. You don't slack off because it snows, with a 2 day warning, and then use weather as an excuse.

My point is, I bet this kind of winter isn't how you picture Arizona. I know I didn't when I learned about it in school. They show you pictures of a cactus, a rattlesnake, a desert in full bloom (which I still haven't seen no matter how hard I tried), and lots of rocky mountains. They don't show you white-out snowy winters in the single-digits, do they? Fortunately the air is so dry and the sun is warm, so our accumulated snow should be gone in just a few days. If we get an inch or two, it's gone that same afternoon. This may take 2 or 3 days, but it'll be great walking weather with cleared gravel roads soon enough. Anyway, here's a picture I took while Tim was driving Adam into work - and right before another white-out, and one from the KFC parking lot while we waited for Adam to be done working.

Christmas 2010

Christmas turned out pretty good this year. We definitely didn't do anything in excess! We all started December thinking that we'd have no gifts for the kids, none for each other, and none for the adults to exchange. Somehow, God managed to provide enough money and creativity and talent to make it a good Christmas.

Adam got money from his 2 aunts, and a 3 month subscription to Xbox live (his only way of talking to friends long-distance during the day). His was about to expire in 4 days so this was good timing. I got him Axe body stuff and hair stuff. Those are his favorites. Tim's parents got him all kinds of edible goodies - also good for a boy struggling to hang onto 120 pounds on a 6'1" body!

Logan got the pair of jeans, ping pong paddle and new bass guitar strings. That's everything he asked for. Tim's father also got him all kinds of cowboy gear: spurs, chaps, and a vest. You should see him when they go riding together in the afternoons. I hear Logan's doing so well, he's actually making Dynamite a better horse. Tim's mother crocheted Logan a hat & scarf set in his favorite colors, black & blue with white trim - he loves them!

Jordan got the Webkinz toys she wanted, a replacement pink set of headphones for her broken ones, and thanks to Debbie, a new, pretty tea cup, and her favorite Vanilla Mint tea.

Tim got sweaters from his parents and I got him a larger, flat spatula like he wanted to use on the griddle side of our industrial kitchen stove.

I got a crocheted pillow in black & pink from Tim's mom, and he surprised me with a silver Monavie bracelet. I also got a diffuser, some Christmas socks and a couple of (baking) edible gift sets.

I got Tim's mother a pretty, delicate tea cup and some decaf vanilla black tea. Tim's father likes work gloves and to make soup. I got him leather gloves to replace a pair with holes in it, and a Soup Bible cookbook. Now he can make soups using stuff from the garden as different vegetables become available.

All in all, it was a good Christmas. We ate together, did gifts together, then Tim and I spent most of the day just being together, playing cribbage, watching Law & Order episodes (on DVD, no TV to the house), and playing Zuma Blitz on Facebook.

It was hard work, I walked 20 miles in 3 days and lost 6 pounds while waitressing for Debbie the weekend before Xmas, but it was enough, and I'm very thankful she gave me the opportunity, or the kids would've gotten absolutely nothing from us.

God is good, I'm blessed with good friends, and I love my family. That's all that matters.

The Amazing Gift

I spent 4 days back in the valley this past weekend. I drove the 200 miles to help out at the tea house where I used to work, hoping that if I work for free, I'd make enough in just tips to buy the kids something, anything, for Christmas. I went there without the money for gas to get home, so I guess you could say I went on faith. I believed that I'd make gas money, plus what I needed to give at church, and even enough to buy the kids at least one little thing each. It was either that or have them wake up to nothing from us Christmas morning. They've had to work harder in the last six months than any other time in their life. I didn't want them to go through a Christmas morning feeling unappreciated, so off I went.

The first day I got there was good. I was full of expectations for a busy few days. I met a new friend I would be serving with, the daughter of someone I know. I got to just ease into the night, watching TV with friends and relaxing. I stayed with my ex-boss and dear friend Debbie, and her husband Joe, and their 5 dogs, and 2 cats. Debbie was kind enough to give me the softest fleece sheets ever. They were so warm and comfortable that it made it really hard to get up and out of bed in the morning.

Thursday was a busy day and I made gas money pretty easily. Thursday night was the real Main Event. We hold about 50 to 60 people comfortably in the cafe. We had to serve a party of 80! It was 40 adults, 20 pre-teen girls, and another 20 kids that were about 7 and under. What a zoo! The people were all family, they said. They were all very polite and nice, but LOUD! They didn't sit so we couldn't get through the aisles, we couldn't keep up with their demands for more tea no matter how fast we went, and the kids broke store items, smashed a few glass things, and got food stains ground into the carpet. We didn't get to leave work til after 10 that night. I don't know that I ever put in a 10 to 10, 12-hour shift on my feet before! The pedometer on my cell phone said I walked 9 miles in that one day! I couldn't wait to get back under those fleece sheets!

Friday was supposed to be a good day to rest, only 2 parties of 3 on the books. I was moving pretty slow (for me) that morning. My legs were killing me, but you just suck it up and know it's all part of the job - a job that has to get done - so you do it. We had so many walk-ins that day that it ended up being a full, busy day. I didn't get to leave until a little after closing time, but I'd made not only gas money, but enough to tithe at church and buy gifts, so I went shopping Friday evening. I was able to get gifts for my household. I'd achieved my goal and still had a whole busy day to go. I was in between those sheets and asleep by 8:30.

Saturday was our Christmas Tea. We had carolers singing in the shop, 2 seatings of people, it was very organized, so I enjoyed it very much. I worked the first shift with one other server, then there were 3 of us on the second shift. I think we all did well. I made enough to get Adam's much-needed haircut before his job interview this week, and even managed to bring a little cash home. What a great weekend.

The highlight of my trip was Saturday night. We were all tired and short-tempered by the end of the weekend, but my friend Moni did something I never expected in a million years:

Last spring I found a charcoal drawing of a cowboy, sitting and praying, I think it's before riding in a rodeo, but with imagination it could've been before or after a long, hard day of work. I don't know why, but it just reminded me of my son Logan, at about age 20. You can't see his face, his head's down and all you see is the top of the angled hat. I can't explain it, but this one piece of art meant so much to me. At the time, we were losing our house so I didn't dare spend the money to buy it. It was in the shop next door to work, so I'd go visit it all the time. I took pictures of it wishing so badly I could bring it home. I never felt like that about anything material before.

After we moved, I'd still visit the picture when we came to the valley. One visit, I went to the shop and it was gone. I couldn't believe it! I was heartbroken. I felt so bad that I didn't buy it when I had the chance. Now it was gone forever. I asked the owner if someone bought it, she told me it had sold a while back.

Moni, my friend, the chef from work, had heard me talk about it. She knew I wanted it so she'd gone in and bought it for me for a Christmas gift. This would've been around June! She had to hold onto it for 6 months without giving away the surprise.

Saturday after work, Moni had me come outside where she pulled it out from behind her back. I couldn't believe what I was seeing! It was like being reunited with a relative (weird, I know, but I can't explain it). I burst into tears and hugged her. I couldn't stop crying for a long time. What a special, heartfelt gift. I don't think even she knew how special her gift was. It's going to hang over the fireplace. I watch Logan as he stares at it. He says he can't stop staring at it when he walks by it. It really is an amazing gift.

I'm blessed with such wonderful friends.

A Great Christmas Party!

Although I didn't take any photos, I have some great memories from the Christmas Party we went to last night. Friends from church invited us to join their adult Sunday School class' party and ornament exchange. I was a little nervous, hoping to know someone there besides those that invited us. What I found was so much more than I had hoped!

As soon as I walked in the door, I saw not only the couple that invited us, but new friends that we'd been with the night before at the Homeschool Christmas fellowship event. Then I saw another woman who I'd met at our 1st (and only) homeschool meeting with the new group up here and she remembered me. Then another friend from my Wednesday night ladies' study was there. And the introductions to everyone else began. I met the most kindest, welcoming people there - and come to find out - I even knew the lady who's house it was! I'd sat at her table at the church tea. I felt like I'd known these people for a lot longer, all so sweet.

The food was amazing! There was a beef roast seasoned and cooked perfectly, all kinds of salad, potato, sweet potato dishes and more! The homemade punch was a strawberry, cranberry lime concoction that was really good too.

Desserts were great too. I made and brought a flourless (very rich) chocolate torte, and there were minty desserts, chocolatey ones, custard-like ones, cookies, homemade breads and more! Everything tasted so good.

The ornament exchange was a lot of fun too. I think we smiled and laughed almost the whole time. This group is so much fun! There were pickle and rubber chicken glass ornaments, some bath kits, tea sets, and home decor bells exchanged. They added a Yankee Swap to it which made for even more fun and innocent teasing.

Afterwards, we said our goodbyes and spent the rest of the ride home talking about wanting to try their Sunday class, even if it means getting up almost 2 hours earlier on the only day we currently get to sleep in til all of 8:00. Now we only have one dilemma: Do we finish out the Wed. study we're in - they're off til January anyway - and do double duty until they're over in late February/early March? Or just jump in and save the 70 mile trip on Wednesdays?

Either way, I feel very blessed and thankful that V & D thought enough to invite us. I feel like I have a whole new batch of friends at church now, which is quickly becoming our "home".

Peanut Butter Bars!

A friend of mine makes the most amazing Peanut Butter Bars. She made them for a restaurant where she worked and she was kind enough to give me the recipe. I can't share it, it belongs to her, but I have shared these bars with lots of people.

Jordan made these bars just about all by herself! We were bringing them to our local homeschool Christmas fellowship event. She did such a great job, they came out perfect. The crust was buttery and just solid enough to stay together, but not crunchy or hard. The frosting is peanut butter mixed with just a few other things until it's so creamy that it really is a frosting, no gritty texture at all, and it's soooo light and airy. Like I said, they came out perfect.

They were so good I'm told, that a few of the guests had to remove themselves from the snack table to avoid eating too many. We sent the rest home with friends there, but that's okay - we made a smaller tray for the kids' class party on Tuesday.

I know, they're homeschooled, so why a party? Because not being in a brick and mortar school, they've never gotten to experience a Christmas class party before, so I thought I'd throw one for them. They requested Cinnamon Rolls, Cupcakes, Buffalo Wings, and soda. I managed to grant their requests plus Bagel bites, the peanut butter bars, and maybe a few other things.

I want them to be able to kick off their school vacation happy and excited (and all that junkfood that they aren't used to getting should accomplish that.)

Tonight though, we're going to a Christmas party for adults only, so we had to "up" the dessert. I'm bringing another secret recipe from the same friend, a (gluten-free) Flourless Chocolate Torte. It's rich and thick and as a personal touch, I add a ganache layer to it. Hope they like it!

Bring on the Christmas Season!

I'm so optimistic about this weekend. After months of feeling alone up here in the middle of nowhere, we're finally going to get to do some socializing beyond the quick hellos of Sunday morning church services. We've been invited to two events this week that I know will really kickstart the holidays for me.

Friday night, we're all invited to a Christmas Pot Luck with our new homeschool group we just joined. I'm hoping there'll be some older kids there. Our poor kids are always just a bit too old for the kids in whatever homeschool group we're in. Most are K-5, but our are in Jr. High & High School. Hopefully they'll meet kids closer to their age so they'll find new friends up here on the mountain. Out here, even a 30 - 40 minute drive to meet up with a friend would be worth the drive. And we'll meet those in the group both in and out of our new church group.

Saturday night we've been invited to an adults-only Christmas party by friends of ours at church. We may not know anyone there but them because it's their Sunday bible study class that's getting together, but at least it'll open the doors for us to meet new people. We're doing a gift exchange too. That's something I've done every year since moving to AZ 7 years ago - so I'm looking forward to that too. I missed getting with my usual group this December.

We did go to a light parade in town last Saturday night. It was short, but it was something festive to do. All the cars, trucks and floats had lights on them and the parade was held after dark. We were going to go to another one in the nearest little town Saturday - but we'd rather go to the Christmas party.

Next week should be fun too. I'll be visiting friends at my old job and putting in a few days there. Maybe I'll earn a little so I can buy the kids something for each of them, but at least I'll get to spend a few days with friends, help out if they're busy, get warm for a few days, visit my old church & friends there, and even get to shop at the better, cheaper organic-based store I miss so much.

December took a while to get going, but it's finally shaping up to be a good month.

And it's officially winter here!

Thanksgiving morning we woke up to a dusting of snow. We knew there was a chance and Jordan's been waiting for weeks! I wasn't as disappointed in the snow as I thought I'd be, maybe just because it was the first of the season. It actually did look pretty on the bushes and on Cinder Mountain. The strange thing is that because we're surrounded by fields of tall grass, it looked like it ONLY snowed in our yard. The white of the snow against the bright yellow of the grass looked very strange and unnatural too. They say the grasses will die off soon and it'll look "normal", but you just don't expect to see those two colors next to each other in nature.

Just a night or two before, Jordan got to decorate the Christmas tree all by herself for the first time ever. She chose to use our Victorian ornaments collection. I've been collecting them for about 18 years now. I usually buy 1 new one a year, Tim's Mom buys me a few most years, and if I get something from my usual Ladies' Bible Study Christmas gift exchange, that goes on the tree, too. The tree came out very nice and she managed to get the lights on and more even than I ever did. We all listened to hours of our Transiberian Orchestra Christmas CDs too.

Thanksgiving dinner wasn't quite what I expected. Maybe it's all the stuff from this past year that led up to it. It went okay, but it was very - uneventful. Mom, Jordan and I cooked for the past 2 days getting ready, but when it came right down to it, we went upstairs, everybody ate as quickly as they normally do, then Tim & his father decided to have all the guys spend 3 hours cutting brush and stacking wood they'd hauled in the day before. No family gathering time, hardly any conversation after eating, no celebration type of feeling...While the guys were working, Jordan and I returned to our kitchen and proceeded to clean for the next two hours. Mom picked up her own kitchen and rested upstairs from being on her feet all morning.

We did get to have our friend Carol spend the meal with us, though. Scott was out of town so we had her join us. After we cleaned, Jordan & I went back upstairs to Mom's and spent about an hour enjoying conversation with her and Carol. That was the highlight of the day.

After working, the guys were sore and tired, so Tim & I watched Turner & Hooch, then Uncle Buck while the kids did their own thing (we don't have any TV stations here). Then we went to bed pretty early. I really hope Christmas is better. I hope to experience the joy, the peace, the magical feel of the holiday. We'll attend the local parade and hope to find some church programs to go to. We're not very commercial when it comes to Christmas anyway, so I hope the meaning isn't lost this year either. We won't be able to buy gifts this year, but we'll bake and cook and make what we can for those closest to us. It's not about the "stuff", it never has been. I just want so much for my children, and I feel like the past year's been a real let-down for them. I do hope they at least will learn from this experience about not feeling so secure in "a good job", will save even more than we did, and understand giving doesn't stop just because times are tight. I hope they learn that faith and family are most important.

All in all, I'm still thankful that our family is warm, dry, indoors, clothed, fed and together. It's enough.

New Scrapbooking ideas

Many of you know, I love to scrapbook. I've been doing it for almost 15 years now. With the exception of sewing on my pages, I've tried almost every technique out there. I've made pages that move, pages with stamping, digital scrapbooking, and even pages using bleach. This winter I'll get to do something different in my pages I haven't done in 7 years - build cold, winter and snow pages! I always liked the sharp contrast of bright white against the dark reds, greens and blues of traditional winter pages, but haven't gotten to make any of those since we lived in New Hampshire back in 2002/2003.

I have things put aside already to build fall pictures. I even dried some red leaves from the yard to use on my pages. I'll have photos of us in sweaters, wearing coats, by the fireplace, and probably in the snow - at least a dusting. They don't get too much snow here.

I'm hoping to enjoy a Christmas parade or two this year with the family. In Phoenix, it was at night, downtown, and we didn't go to those. In Mesa, the parade was about 15 minutes long and mainly consisted of a high school band, a Red Hats elderly group, and Veterans in uniform walking (in their 80s and 90s). The rest was just local businesses driving a car waving and people in puppet suits I didn't recognize.

We'll see what they have going on in Show Low and St. John's for "Electric Light Parades" in December. And we're hoping to host a Christmas party for our local business team here at the house too. Maybe there'll even be something at our new church to attend.

All of these should produce great photos for some new and exciting scrapbook pages that I haven't been able to design for years!

My Top 10 Things to do this Holiday Season

1. Try to make my own Christmas cards. How many will depend on how many scrapbooking supplies I have.

2. Sit by the fireplace. I haven't experienced real cold in 7 years. I plan on drinking lots of tea & cocoa by the fire all winter long.

3. Making Christmas gifts. This may be baking, cooking, involve scrapbooking, or if I run out of ideas, I'll be giving out the pickles we canned this fall.

4. Experiencing the events up here on the mountain, parades, bazaars, festivals, whatever there is up here in the middle of nowhere.

5. Watching lots of Christmas movies with the kids. Besides Snoopy and It's A Wonderful Life...any ideas?

6. Scrapbooking! I miss it, have lots of space, could find time to do it, but I'm out of supplies. I haven't bought anything new for a few years so I could use up older stuff. Now I need papers and adhesives and albums.

7. Listen to Christmas music. My favorite is Transiberian Orchestra's CDs, but if I'm in a mellow mood, I've got a few Manheim Steamroller CDs too.

8. Find a church event to attend so I can meet new people. I think I'll go to the tea they're doing mid-November.

9. Do something at the house for our homeschool group, maybe host a hang-out, game night for gr. 7 - 12 so older kids have something to do too.

10. Cook a Mexican Christmas menu (even if it's the week before Christmas dinner). I love tamales, enchiladas, real rice & beans, etc.

Halloween weekend

We've never celebrated Halloween in our household. When I was growing up, I did, but I wasn't a Christ-follower then, and neither were my parents. Tim grew up as a Jehovah's Witness when he was in elementary school. When we got married and had kids, Tim said that he didn't want our kids to celebrate it, I researched the origins, and realized that if my faith was important to me, I didn't want to celebrate it either. Over the years we've asked the kids how they feel about it and although it would be fun to dress up, which they did throughout the year for other events anyway, they really didn't feel like they were missing out. They enjoyed getting home just before trick or treating hours were over, sneak into the dark house by the back door, unseen. They they'd "spy" on the neighborhood kids and comment on what costumes were creative, popular, and unexpected.

What we usually do on Oct. 31st is launch our holiday season. I usually take the kids out for a breakfast-supper at IHOP or Denny's. Then we discuss what we want to do for the holidays: menus, gifts, what we'll make for others, any volunteering we'll do, etc.

This year we're sharing a house with Tim's parents and for the past 6 years (it started when Tim's cousin Rachel lived here and did Halloween with her son Darren), they've handed out candy. There's about 30 kids that make a point to stop here they tell me, so they hand out candy. Knowing this, we decided maybe we'd try just handing out candy with Mom this year.

To hand out the candy, Jordan & Logan wanted to know if they could dress up as 80s rockers. Tim & I talked it over and agreed they could. At this age, dressing up isn't going to change their whole faith and belief system. They got all decked out, even invited their 2 friends that live nearby to stay overnight. They were ready.

Concho, AZ isn't officially a city, or even an official town. It's a community, maybe a village, whatever you want to call it, but there's no city government, no one to decide on what hours or even what DAY to go trick or treating. Everything here is run as just part of Apache County. We all played a few games of Monopoly, first the adults, then the boys. All night we waited, from about 5 - 9:30 pm, and no one came - not a single kid. Our kids were so disappointed. Their hoping they come tonight. Up here, there's a lot of Mormon families and they celebrate all holidays that fall on a Sunday - on Saturday, to keep Sunday holy. So we thought they'd come last night. Maybe since the closest 2 or 3 towns did big city-wide events last night on Saturday, maybe the kids here will come trick or treating tonight so they get to do both. There's a K-8 school within walking distance from our house, so we know there's lots of kids to potentially come here.

If they do come tonight...we'll be ready for them.

Now it's really Fall up on the mountain!

For the past 7 years we've had 2 seasons, summer and not summer. Now we're back to having 4 seasons and it feels very strange. It's down to the high 60s during the day and between 35 and 45 and night. We're going shopping in 2 weeks for warm clothes! Adam & Jordan don't own coats, I, along with them, don't own hardly any long-sleeve shirts! We haven't worn socks, sweaters, hats, gloves, any of that, since we lived in NH when they were little. I think at least for the 1st winter, we'll see it as "fun". We'll see dustings of snow - but it'll melt the same day. We'll get to enjoy sitting by the fireplace when we do our History and Literature Discussions for school. We'll get to sip hot cocoa wrapped up in my favorite Mexican blanket to stay warm, cuddled up with a good book. The kids' reading spots have already changed to "whatever chair is in the sun". And if we're lucky, I'll get to take photos and scrapbook the kids making small snowballs, shoveling (mostly just for fun, an inch or two of snow), and I'll get to use up those winter stickers and patterned paper I've kept all these years.

Fall here means there's a few trees here, more in town, with their leaves turned yellow and bright red. The green grasses have turned a golden brown. The sunsets are yellow, gold and orange instead of blue and purple, the garden is all done, canning pickles is done (finally), and October means tarantulas blow into the pool we don't use. Here's some pictures of fall around here - just know that in real life, the colors are brighter and more vivid. The red vine is usually green except this time of year - it's called a Virginia Creeper.

It's the beginning of fall.

Up here in the mountains, you can tell it's the beginning of fall. A few of the plants are taking on that reddish tint to their leaves, the nights are colder, and our daytime high is in the 70s and low 80s. The hummingbirds have slowed down and we're harvesting from the garden out back. Anyone need any cucumbers?

I'm not sure how we'll do this first winter. Maybe it'll be exciting because it's new all over again. Maybe it'll be harder than we thought - most of us don't own warm weather clothes anymore and the last time I bought coats, the kids were 5, 7 and 9 - now they're 12, 14 and 16!

Either way, I'm enjoying a quieter life now. There are moments when I feel bored or lonely for a friend, but it's not that often. Mostly I'm thankful we aren't in a 1000sf condo for the 5 of us, there aren't strangers walking by my front door, I'm not listening to the neighbors fighting (again), and my kids are safe here, and oh yeah, you can even drink the water here!

Fall will be a time of freezing veggies from the garden, canning pickles, dressing in sweaters and sweatshirts I haven't worn in 8 years (I'm smaller now, yeah!), and cuddling up next to the fireplace with my snuggie and a cup of cocoa. And I get to use the griddle on our stainless industrial stove! It takes an hour to heat up and several hours to cool down, so we only plan on using it in the winter. I can't wait for that either!

This Christmas we're all trying to figure out what to make for each other. It'll be a thoughtful holiday with effort going into the gifts we make and give to each other. If you have a safe, warm house, surrounded by family, a beautiful tree in the corner to commemorate the season, what more do you need?

I'm also looking forward to having a fall tea sometime soon. Lots of goodies with pumpkin, cranberries, oranges and cinnamon. So what will you do to bring in the fall?